I just got an email to my work address offering me a job. I get these sort of messages semi-regularly because there are lots of headhunting companies that spam to entire corporate mail directories, so I wasn’t too surprised. I usually read them to giggle at how poorly targeted they are, or how I’m being offered a job at a third of my current wage.

The message, however was different. It was very polite and professional, and it had the ring of a real job offer. I’ll trim some of the extras from it, but the gist of it is:

Today the Sydney Car Centre is looking for an industrious regional assistant to hasten the process of the delivery of customer payments to the suppliers. The position offered is a part-time job, and will only require from you to be available for 1-2 hours a day.

As a regional assistant, you will be supposed to operate with the payments from those customers, based in your country. You will be expected to accept 2-3 transactions to your bank account every week, make certain calculations about every transaction (you will be precisely instructed about it), & transfer the funds to the suppliers by means of western Union/Money Gram less your fee & the charges of the Western Union/Money Gram.

I would get to keep 10% of any transactions that I “process” and I “will be continuously communicating with the manager from the head office, who will instruct you & give advice regarding every new payment”.

They transfer funds to my bank account and pay me 10% to turn around and Western Union the money to someone else. That doesn’t sound too fishy.

Dear, I’m quitting my job to become a money launderer! Oh, and If a guy named Guido calls every few hours, just forward him down to my office.

After an amazing week away, we’re home. The posts that came up were pre-set to show up on certain days, sort of like putting the lights on a timer so no one wanders in to the blog and takes all the furniture.

The kids had a great time with our (amazing, wonderful, stupendous) friends on their property outside town. MrsPages and I had an unbelievable time at Barrier Bay Resort. There’s a place that really knows how to treat guests like royalty. All the little details that make people feel welcome were taken care of.

The entire family’s week included: deer, fireflies, a trip to emergency for a 2 year-old’s fall down the stairs (that resulted in nothing serious and that MrsPages thankfully didn’t hear about until today), petroforms, Kick the Can, key-lime dipped ice cream cones, bicycle rides, Stormy the dog, graham cracker Gingerbread houses, wood ticks, mosquitoes, hot tubs, ice-cold kiddie pools, a two-hour parcheesi game, barbecued steaks, homemade granola, laughter and relaxation.

A good week. A very good week.

When I graduated from University 10 years ago MrsPages bought me a Tilley hat, specifically a “T2″, that most wonderful of Canadian inventions.

My Tilley has become somewhat of a signature. The large brimmed hat and my red beard make me pretty distinctive. This hat has been worn while swimming, rapelling, climbing, boating, used to clean pipes in Nicaragua, used to haul water while camping, used as a seat cover, thrown to scare away animals, and worn every second of summer for 10 years. It is incredibly well made and has only got better with age. The material finally gave out while I was working on the orphanage plumbing in Nicaragua. The hatband tore, and the crown started to come off.

However, the best part about a Tilley hat is that if you ever wear it out they will replace it for free! I sent the torn hat in a box with $7.50 for shipping, and they sent me back a brand new one (and the old one back) with no questions asked.

Remember when you were a kid and you got brand new sneakers and you hated the shining whiteness? Well, I have to go find some abuse to put my new hat through so it looks like mine again. I’m taking requests.